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Am I Bad? Revovering From Abuse

Heyward Bruce Ewart III
Loving Healing Press (2007)
ISBN 9781932690330
Reviewed by Kam Aures for RebeccasReads (11/08)

“Am I Bad?  Recovering from Abuse” is the sixth book in the New Horizons in Therapy Series from Loving Healing Press.  As stated in the introduction, “The purpose of this book is not to provide treatment techniques, although some principles are mentioned, but to furnish from real-life case histories a penetrating and hopefully unforgettable look at what causes domestic violence:  child abuse.  Vivid understanding of the cause must precede the development of effective treatment.  Further, the intent is to show many other consequences of child abuse, most importantly a distorted sense of self, which greatly limits the chances of a fulfilling life.” ( p. v)

Ewart most certainly achieves his objective of providing unforgettable images of child abuse through the case histories.  To me, one of the most vivid of the histories presented involved physical abuse to a man named Lloyd whose mother used to continuously whip him with a switch over and over again.  Lloyd recalls trying to stand still as ordered but “slipping on his own blood upon the wooden floor.” (p. 50) Tortured for his entire life, he was unable to talk during sessions and was only able to yell and scream in anger.  He had been placed in psychiatric hospitals, had been in jail, and was addicted to drugs and alcohol.  Throughout the years he was never accurately diagnosed.  What he was suffering from was “complex post-traumatic stress disorder” from the physical abuse.  Once this was understood, he was able to start on the path to recovery.  The events that the people profiled in this book have been through are haunting and the resulting effects upon their well-being and future selves are heartbreaking. 

People abused as children tend to gravitate toward abusers as they grow, therefore always being stuck in an abusive cycle and never breaking free from the trauma endured as a child. “Am I Bad?  Recovering From Abuse” delves into these issues in order to help provide an understanding of the effects and consequences of the abuse in hopes that this will “bring everything to light” (back cover) thus enabling those who were abused to step onto the road to recovery.

The book provides the reader with an in depth understanding into the long-lasting effects of abuse and also provides a number useful tests and tools to aid in such areas as uncovering concealed child abuse and screening for potentially dangerous employees.    “Am I Bad?  Recovering from Abuse” is an important book and would be a beneficial read for those who were abused as children, those currently suffering from abuse, those working with the abused, and anyone who knows someone who has been abused. 

    

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